Hear that? That thump from the other side of the room right after you turn off your lights? In rational reality it could just be a strewn object from the room you meant to clean days ago.

Or it could be the skinless creature watching you sleep.

——————

While I’m no Stephen King or R.L. Stine, I am the bearer of good news for all you horror fans out there. No longer will you have to troll the dark side of the Internet to get your late night scare fix.

Twitter, in all its messy glory, has created a new horror profile. For those of you who are terrified of your own shadow, I’ve used my talents of being desensitized and dead-on-the-inside to troll this creepy feed.

First impressions:

-For the scare-thusiasts who have worked the corner of Internet into the weird hours of the night, it probably won’t prove as too much of a shock. For the chickens of the world, you might wanna prepare by turning all the lights on and having a change of underwear handy.

-The profile does an amazing job of preying on a good majority of people’s phobias. Arachnaphobia? Check. Clowns? Mhmm. Photos that make you look twice before crying? Girl, you already know.

So here is warning to stop reading as I present 5 of the profile’s most skin-crawling posts. You make it through these and you’re basically a bad bitch. May Miss Tina and her sorcery watch over you as you scroll.

TinaKnowles

1.  Girl don’t back that ass up yet – you just started!

hunchback

                   

2. Being watched while you sleep? Be thankful SOMEONE loves you.

dark room shot

3. #iwokeuplikethis #flawless #nofilter

mummy

4. Spiders took over your house? You didn’t need that much space anyway.

spiders

5. Maybe when someone labels their food in the fridge you’ll listen next time

clown mask

6. STOP TEXTING DURING THE MOVIE.

BgFDOZuIcAEvF5K

See you did it! Now go forth knowing it’s going to take more than a few ghosts and some Photoshop to spook you.

And remember…

…Sweet dreams!

  • Dodo Dodi

    the last one had me shaking